Sarah Palin, Tina Fey Launch Teas Party

2-fer-Teas president better than one

Parody, May 25, 2010

Eight years under Bush2 proved that we could scrape by with a headless government. But now Sarah Palin has joined forces with Tina Fey to launch the Teas Party in a bid for a two-headed co-presidency in 2012.

"You think we're just teas-in?" said Ms. Palin during a press conference today. "If I can hit a moose at 200 yards, it's sure as shootin' I can set my sights on the highest office on the hill." Palin explained that with look-alike co-presidents, "there will be no need for a vice president, but I'll be in charge of the vice. Tina can handle the yucky, the spills 'n' stuff."

Fey, who used to make fun of Palin, has settled down for the sake of party unity. "It's a perfect shotgun, or moose-rifle, marriage of Alaska and New York, of conservative and liberal," Fey said. She plans to give up her popular 30 Rock TV show and instead create a 60s Rock party atmosphere, with campaign music from the Beatles, Beach Boys and Mick Jagger. "I can already think of some 30-something guys I'd like to have as interns," Fey said. "I'd consider Evan Lysacek, but only if he'd wear a blue skating outfit, and only if he's actually straight."

The Teas Party will encompass the full gamut of the American melting teapot, according to Palin, including spearmint, sleepytime and earl grayhairs. "If you want Teas, you got Teas," Palin said. "Just wait 'til you see our Cabinet."

—James Dunn
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